Answer 1

Answer 2

What do you call a dog on the beach in the Summer?
A hot dog.

Answer 3

How did the dog stop the DVD?
He pressed the paws button.

Answer 4

What time is it when there are 5 dogs and 1 cat?
Five after one.

Answer 5

What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter. It's not going to come anyway!

Answer 6

A 3-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and then announces "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw!"

Answer 7

Two blondes were walking down the street. The first said "look at that dog with one eye!" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says "why?"

Answer 8

How do fleas travel?
They itch hike.

Answer 9

Man: Why is everything in your house damaged?
Woman: My dog is in the middle of being housebroken.

Answer 10

What dog flies on the Concorde?
A jet setter

Answer 11

Sandra: Why did you choose him as your veterinarian?
Tonya: He's also a taxidermist so no matter what happens I'll always get my dog back.

Answer 12

Mark: I'm so sick of my dog. He chases everyone on a bike.
Stan: What a pain. Are you going to have him put down?
Mark: No, I think I'll just take away his bike.

Answer 13

What is the difference between a businessman and a warm dog?
The businessman wears a suit. The dog just pants.

Answer 14

Why didn't the boy advertise in the newspaper when he lost his dog?
His dog never read the paper.

Answer 15

Why should you watch when it's raining cats and dogs?
You don't want to step in a poodle!

Answer 16

"Why is your dog the first one to the door every time the doorbell rings? It's never for him."

Answer 17

"He's a great watchdog. The other day it watched a burglar while he broke in and stole all our TV."

Answer 18

What happened to the dog that ate garlic?
His bark was much worse than his bite!

Answer 19

What did the man say when he caught his best friend sleeping with his wife?
"Bad dog!"

Answer 20

Why is it called "getting your dog fixed" when it doesn't work after that?

Answer 21

What do you get when you cross a pit bull and a collie?
A dog that runs for help after he bites your leg off

Answer 22

What kind of parents does a mixed breed dog have?
A father and a mutter

Answer 23

What is a dog's favorite part of a tree?
The bark

Answer 24

Why did the dalmatian go to the cleaners?
His coat had spots all over it!

Answer 25

Sign: Ignore the Dog. Watch Out for the Owner.

Answer 26

What do you call the top of a doghouse?
The woof

Answer 27

What did the dalmatian say after he ate?
That hit the spots!

Answer 28

How do you make a dog drink?
Put it in a blender.

Answer 29

What do you call a Bulldog and Shitzu mix? Bullshit

Answer 30

What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street? Put them in...

Answer 31

What do you get when you cross a puppy and a cantaloupe? A...

Answer 32

"My dog's so obedient... I said 'heel' and he bit me right there!"

Answer 33

Why is it called a litter of puppies? Because they mess up the...