Answer 1

How many police officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. It turned itself in.

Answer 2

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but they have to be very tiny!

Answer 3

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but the light bulb has to WANT to change.

Answer 4

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a hardware issue.

Answer 5

How many firefighters does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. Three to cut a hole in the roof and one to change the bulb.

Answer 6

How many judges does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. But the two lawyers have to explain to him how to do it.

Answer 7

How many Russian leaders does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows. Russian leaders don't last as long as light bulbs.

Answer 8

How many newsmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. But he'll tell everybody.

Answer 9

How many Scotsmen does it take to change a light bulb?
Scotsmen don't change light bulbs. It's cheaper to sit in the dark.

Answer 10

How many Englishmen does it take to change a light bulb?
What do you mean change it? It's a perfectly good bloody bulb! We have had it for a thousand years and it has worked just fine!

Answer 11

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to give the order that the bulb be changed and one to screw it in.

Answer 12

How many applicants does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But 200 applied for the job.

Answer 13

How many recovering addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. But it takes 12 steps.

Answer 14

How many grocery store cashiers does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you kidding me? They won't even change a five-dollar bill!

Answer 15

How many pessimists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It doesn't matter. They think all the available bulbs won't light up.

Answer 16

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four. Only one to screw it in. The other three to listen to him brag about screwing it!

Answer 17

How many optimists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. The power should be back on any minute anyways!

Answer 18

How many aerospace engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. It doesn't take a rocket scientist, you know!

Answer 19

How many yuppies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Yuppies screw in hot tubs!

Answer 20

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? How many can...

Answer 21

How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb? None. They...

Answer 22

How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb? None....

Answer 23

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They...

Answer 24